I'm Two Awesome (haha...pun totally intended)

And now for a little brainstorming! Tell me, my lovely darlings, how familiar are you with some of these expressions, phrases, facts, or questions:

May I have the last four digits of your SSN?
Just gimme your cell number!
How many miles does it have?
And now let's check your heart rate...
I'm hating the gas prices...
Yes, I want a #1, a #3, and add a milkshake.
How many credit hours did you complete this semester?
Rinse and repeat.
Well, America has voted!
BOGO!!!!
And let me tell you about the interest rate...
On a scale of 1-10, with 10 being the best...
94 % fat-free
Date of Birth:
We waited hours in line.
What's the score?
Hi, welcome to Chili's! How many is in your party?
Octamom
I clocked you going 75 in a 40.
Your blood pressure is...
GPA:
It had how many hits?
Please turn to page number...
The amount of debt you have...geesh!
Congrats on the race! What was your time?
How many sides do I get with the entree?
You must be 48 inches tall to ride this ride.
How much money should I leave for a tip?
I need to get my credit score checked.
Do 3 sets of 10 four times at least three days this week.
The recommened number of hours for sleep is 6-7.
Mailing Address:
I graduated number 34 in my class.

Look at that! Do you know how frustrating it is to be over the top horribly bad at math when the world functions on numbers?!? I once took the GRE and then they sent me my scores (more numbers) with the percentage of those who scored under me. I had a single digit percentage in math for those who scored lower than I did because my score was soooooo low that the single digit percentage won a hypothetical game of limbo for getting under mine. It probably pulled it's poor percentage back out (ha, how's that for some alliteration...take that math). There's no excuse for me being bad at math because the use of numbers is everywhere. I want you to brainstorm and think about how many important life decisions were made because of what the numbers were. Your success is measured numerically...that can't be argued. It's proven as early as your GPA and follows you all the way to your income. Some people are lucky and land a gravy job without any effort, and they live this gravy kinda life. By gravy life I mean that it looks really good, but the "gravy" is full of gelatinous lumps (aka debt), a questionable skin (aka ignorance), and unidentifiable meat products (aka moments that end on The Maury Show), and then there are those of us who are awesome at our jobs and get paid with I Owe You's, a big thanks to the state of North Carolina for that one. (I apologize for offending gravy.)

We, the frustrated ones, can't help but feel like our personal success is measured by numbers, too. How many calories does that have? How many miles did you run today? What's your jean size? What's your BMI? How much weight have you lost? How much weight have you gained? What percentage of fat is from calories? How many servings are in that bag? How many diets have you tried? How many inches is your waist? How many times did you mentally box yourself in the gut for thinking about a craving that you'll refuse to indulge in while working out in a sauna at what temperture wrapped in how many plastic bags while lifting twenty-five lb weights during your Insanity Workout at four in the morning after having lost three hours of sleep because you feel guilty for tasting a fat-free bread crumb? TOO MANY TIMES, but the bread crumb was totally worth it!

Yes, I admit it; there are times when I feel only as good the number on the scale, and I'm never happy with the number. What kind of spiral am I creating for myself? Not a healthy one! But I can't help it because everything else in life is defined by a number. For instance, ladies, if you didn't know what I looked like and you saw these numbers describing me, what would you think? I'm 5'9", 117 lbs, size 0 jeans, 34 C.....oh, I can't even go on because I hate her! The only time a 0 has been on my jeans is when it followed a 1, and that's when I was skinny. Seriously, those numbers make me want to punch a man in the face. Holy soapbox moment diverted...

I'm bad at math, so I'm an English Teacher (I mean, I still sucked at English, but not as much as math. Be prepared to spot errors upon errors because I refuse to proofread myself. It's summer break for crying outloud). I love words, not numbers. So today, I am making a declaration: From here on out, I will not be defined as a number. This past Saturday, I weighed in and I didn't like what I saw, but a close girlfriend gave me positive words, and you know what? I listened, and I didn't let the number get to me. However, my inner fat kid doesn't always provide me with nice words, so that causes an internal struggle (future blog post). Even when the scale says what I want it to, it still does not define Abigail. Puh-lease, do you think the awesomeness of Abigail Newton can be measured by a number...? Uhhhhhhh, are you really thinking about that? Is that something that you just had to contemplate...get to steppin'. Anyway, there is a time to celebrate a number and there is a time to ignore it. Celebrate that you have how many supportive friends and family; celebrate the moments when you laughed until you peed yourself; celebrate all those days when you are physically able to get up and do something; celebrate you and your age!

My husband tells me everyday that I'm beautiful...and even though that phrase consists of two words, the meaning behind them can't be measured by anything. When I hear those words, I become them. I'm not a number on a scale, I'm beautiful, and so are you. I challenge you to surrender your number obsession!!