No KFC "Bucket List"

So, yeah, my whole plan of being uberly productive is left on the side of the road where I had to turn around. Geesh! However, I have been working on this post for a little bit now, so here's to making proper use of my lazy time.  

     I was half tempted to make resolutions at the start of this year, but you all know me so well...ehh. My resolutions never ever ever actually happen. I give it a go, and sometimes I stick with it for many months. Heck, my resolution of making one new recipe a week lasted until we moved back to the states. But in truth, I shouldn't have to wait until a new year rolls around for me to get my act together. Also, I'm a busy person, and there's no guarantee that I can everything I want finished within a year. A year may seem like a long time, that is until you make a To-Do list, and then woosh! Before you know it, your husband is about to come home from deployment and you still haven't mowed the lawn. Moving on...
    I have a lot of personal goals; I promise that I aspire to be more than someone who is obsessed with weight loss and working out. I mean, I'm not at the moment...this topic runs/ruins my life, but that's the point of aspirations...change is in the future...possibly. Well, until that day comes, I'm still obsessed. With this obsession comes interests, addictions, investments, education, trainings, hobbies, and wants. I want to do everything and try everything. I'll get something in my mind, research the crud out of it, get a little overwhelmed, see an informercial on something else, switch gears, and repeat the entire process. With all of that in mind, I am actively creating a Health and Fitness Bucket List. These are things I really want to do in the near future, and when I say near future, I'm saying before I'm 80 years old. I've told Reuben many times that at 80 I'm hanging it up. Literally, on my 80th birthday, I'm going to rent a Ryan's Steakhouse for the night, so I can pull a chair up directly to the buffet. I'll also rent a stomach pump as to keep the eating continuos. Yep, that's the plan. Aren't you excited, babe?
     Some of these things/programs on my list have been researched and some haven't, but I feel like I owe it to myself to accomplish these goals.

Health and Fitness Bucket List

Run a total of five full marathons

I ran one last April and have another in three weeks...eek.

Eat a vegan/raw diet for one month

I'm not a huge meat eater, and I feel with some accurate literature that I could do this. I might be cranky and unapproachable, but I might feel better than I ever have. 

Complete P90X

I've done Insanity two and half times...it's time to move on. 

Complete Beachbody's Ultimate Reset Program 

My BB coach did this with some challengers, and I was envious of the willpower they modeled and benefits they reaped. I think this will teach me a lot about recognizing cravings and recognizing hunger.

Partake in a Disney race of some sort

I do not have one in mind, but it's Disney!!

Organize a 5K and/or 10K

This has been a dream of mine since I completed my first 5K in 2008.

Compete in a SPRINT triathlon

Water terrifies me to no end and bikes are not my friend, but I think this is something my husband could blow away, and I would love to train together. 

Get Body Gospel Certified 

I would love nothing more than to dance while worshipping Jesus, and what better way to do it than to lead it?

Mud Run and/or Warrior Dash

I've saved some skanky tennis shoes for this event.

Organize a fitness/weight loss group for students

I see so many of my students, and I just want to help them and teach them how to make better decisions. They are worth the attention and they are worth the change; I want to make them see that themselves. 

Host a Zumbathon

Let's put this certification to work!

Choose a year, and run one organized race a month

It's important to keep in mind that running races can add up, so that's why I say choose a year. 

Complete the Ab Ribber X 30 Day Challenge

I can't tell you how many times I've started it; I'd like to actually say that I completed it. 

Regain my flexibility 

An unknown injury has jeopardized my left piriformis, causing extreme pain and limited flexibility. I just wrapped up fifteen sessions of physical therapy, and with what they showed me, I hope to be able to touch my toes again.  

Run a 5K with my mom

I believe in her more than she believes in herself. I'd love for her to experience that self pride.  

I'm not going to lie; I took a Nyquil, so it's time to go. I'll wrap it up by saying this: these are not all the things that will be on my list. I'm sure I'll add to it over time, but until then this list will get my attention. Some of these things I'm already working on, like running another marathon, hosting a Zumabthon, and regaining my flexibility. When's the last time you did a backbend? Those things hurt, dude. The other goals will have to be completed over time. And just think, you'll be lucky enough to hear about every single word of each experience...go you!! Just curious...what would be on your list? I need more ideas...

I Yelled at God, but He Yelled Louder

Seyo is happily running around the house since she now has the room to do so--14 hours in a car will test any cat's patience--I've unloaded the Pathfinder, leaving everything by the front door; I've crawled into bed sans washing face due to being so tired, but I couldn't go to sleep without sharing this. I was going to type a facebook post tonight about it, but I realized it might be too long of a post for the ol' FB. It was going to be something along the lines of this, but now that I have the comfort of blog space, it's probably more wordy than intended:

As I was driving home tonight, I really felt the hand of God on my heart, and it felt good. Little of you know that it hasn't always been that way. Around four years ago, I was at one of my lowest points in life. In a short span of time, I endured my second miscarriage, my first husband had moved out, alcohol use was frequent, and I devoted every second of my life to the gym where I worked myself crazy so I would be too exhausted to feel emotions. One night when the workouts didn't suffice and I was faced with having to sort through my emotions, I got mad at God for "putting" me through so much pain. And I swear to you that this 100% true--I was so mad and so emotional that I sat in my living room floor, bawling, "God, I quit! I can't do this anymore. I don't know what you want from me. I don't know what you want me to learn, but I quit trying to figure it out. I'm yours. You do what you want with me because I'm too d**n tired to do it myself!! If you want me to hurt, fine! If you want me to be happy, fine! I SURRENDER!! I don't care anymore. Do whatever...!" That night, I cried myself to sleep. The next day, Reuben called me.

I've told Reuben that story many times and have explained to him that I truly see him as a gift from God. Could it be a coincidence? We'll never know. But because of how the events unfolded, I believe in the words "I surrender." When I surrendered my words, my heart, my trust, my beliefs, my life to God, things instantly got better. When I said that I surrendered, I really did. I had to put that trust out there. I couldn't just say it and then still try to hold the reigns. Fast forward to today, I have an amazing family who bends over backwards for me, a husband who does not let miles stop him from making me feel flawless, multiple communities that make me feel appreciated, friends from all over the world who put energy into maintaining our friendship, and Seyo...can't leave her out.

Some of those things existed in my life always, like my very supportive family and incredible friendships, but I wasn't ever in a place that I could see it. I honestly didn't know how to count my blessings. I was too busy trying to create what I thought should be blessings. "What's a better blessing than a baby?" I was so wrapped up in what I didn't have...I let it consume me. To say that I am blessed is an understatement. But I thought about this a lot tonight, and I openly communicated my gratitude to God.

I'm not saying I'm the perfect Christian; I'm far from it, but I can honestly say that I'm trying. Since God has made such an effort into showing me that He hears me, the least I can do is try. My heart is happier because of it. With that being said, I urge you to make 2014 the year you surrender if you have yet to do so. I just really don't even know what I'm trying to say anymore. All I know is my heart is bursting with a feeling that I want everyone to experience. I want nothing more than for the people in my life to feel the peace of mind that comes with making that declaration. I'm grateful for my life and the direction it took. I look forward to 2014 and all the blessings God has in store.